SAFE INSIDE
A company exec’s tips for picking safe sex toys.

by Metis Black

The first time we were together, I reached for a strap-on, but she stopped me. She told me that while she loved sex toys, they didn’t love her. Every time she tried a dildo or any soft vibrator, her pussy was red and swollen in the morning, and she could hardly walk. It hurt—and not in that good way. There was something very, very wrong.

And I knew just what it was: she had been playing with novelties!

I’m part of an industry that makes "novelties," which is one of those words you think means one thing—a polite word for "sex toys"—while it really means something totally different. "Novelty" is actually a legal term for a product never intended for real use; most toys in your average adult store are clearly marked "For sale as novelty product only." Novelties are an industry built around the adage: buyer beware.

Well, that’s fine if you’re a gag-gift aficionado, but it makes for a frustratingly empty toy box for a girl who likes to play.

Like me. Part of my job as a toy designer is to understand why one product is better than another and how to make new toys even more effective. I’ve bought many brand-name items that I wouldn’t let near my body; it was bad enough opening the package without a gas mask and protective gloves.

A sex toy should be safe. It should have a design that works with your anatomy and be finished so that it won’t cause scratches or abrasions to your most sensitive flesh. It should be made of a material free of chemicals that cause physical reactions. I don’t know about you, but I put toys in either my pussy or my ass, both of which have very sensitive skin that separates the toy from my bloodstream. When we talk about chemicals not being stable, remember where they escape.

If you use toys, you need to educate yourself about what’s in there. You’ve probably never heard of phthalates, for example, but you’ve certainly smelled them. They are softeners added to what would naturally be a hard material; they are what make that "new car smell." They are also respiratory inhibitors and carcinogens.

With novelties, you can smell the phthalates as soon as you open the packaging. When you can smell a toy, its chemistry is unstable, and the toy is outgassing. Studies conducted with phthalates on animals are the things horror stories are made of.

The latest studies indicate that phthalates are endocrine disrupters, interfering with hormones and boosting estrogen levels. Besides a possible link to reduced sperm count and the rise of testicular cancer, this disruption of hormones may counteract breast cancer medicines. So any transmen should really think twice about what they are playing with. Baby-product manufacturers and pet-product manufacturers have voluntarily eliminated phthalates from their product lines, but with novelties, we’re back to buyer beware.

Mystery Materials

Let’s face it—with a lot of toys the only person who could really tell what they’re made of is a chemist. Are these products safe? I’d recommend using a condom on them. If you’re especially latex-sensitive, don’t take a chance.

On the condom, you can still use water-soluble or a silicone lubricant. If you are using these toys condom-free, then use only water-based lubes and dedicate each toy to one person. Chances are the pores are open on your mystery-material toys; you will be sharing bacteria no matter how much you clean them. And cleaning can be tricky; a special toy cleaner is the safest bet, although a soft soap is also good. If the toy has electronic components (no matter what it’s made of), you want to very gently use a wash rag to soap it up and then to rinse.

Jelly Rubber

Is your toy translucent with lots of bubbles? Does it smell like a chemical factory? If so, you have jelly in your collection. Jelly is PVC with a phthalate softener. PVC is perfectly safe, meeting all food-grade standards. It’s the phthalate that makes jelly a problem. After exposure, you may find your intimate parts enflamed and burning, and you may get a discharge similar to a yeast infection. The only safe way to enjoy jelly is to put a condom over it.

And only use water-soluble lubricants because other lubes will melt the jelly material. In fact, a jelly toy may melt simply sitting too close to a toy of another material. (Keep all your toys out of the sun too!) Dishwashing liquid soaps are too harsh for this type of toy, and alcohol will dissolve it, so you really should only use special toy cleaners. To store your jelly toy, make sure it is dry and separated from other toys.

Latex

Latex is probably the most common material used for toys. It’s certainly been around the longest (since the 1930s). It’s inexpensive, and it’s made into every shape and size. Latex is always opaque and can be produced in a variety of colors. You have probably heard of latex allergy or sensitivity as it is getting more and more common. The more exposure you have to latex, the more likely you are to start reacting. So even after many years of safely using your toys, if you wake up one morning to reactions that mimic a yeast infection—inflammation, rash, and discharge—throw the latex away.

The pores on latex are semi-porous, so, as funny as it sounds, you should cover your latex toy with a latex condom. As any safe-sex student knows, never use an oil-based lube or alcohol on latex as they break down the material. Latex should be cleaned with a soft soap or a special toy cleaner.

CyberSkin, SoftSkin, UltraSkin

They all feel almost real; they are soft and subtle and ideal for packing. The base materials are combinations of silicone and latex, so if you’re latex-sensitive, see above.

My company has done experiments combining latex with silicone; what we’ve found is that the softer we make it (the more latex we use), the more it seeps and oil is released. (You can do a blot test on a clean sheet of paper at home to see how your toy stands up.)

Again, the safest way to use these products for insertion is to wrap them in a condom, particularly because any lubricants seem to degrade these materials, making a nice, stiffy absolutely flaccid.

The only thing that will stick to silicone is silicone, so some silicone lubricants will bond to silicone toys. There are exceptions, but since it’s impossible to enumerate them, let me make a blanket statement that silicone lubricants are incompatible with silicone, or partly silicone, toys.

If you love silicone lubricant, try a test patch on the bottom base of your silicone toys. If the patch doesn’t get gummy, so that the only way to clean it is with your thumbnail, it’s probably going to be just fine. Likewise, with combination silicone-latex products, you should also avoid oil-based lubricants (because of the latex).

You have to clean these skinlike materials very carefully if you want to maintain the texture. They are semi-porous, and if you rub them firmly, you will tear the surface. So, again, use toy cleaner or mild hand soap and then dry the toy inside and out. To keep it from getting sticky, dust all surfaces with cornstarch before putting them away. (Never use talcum powder, which can cause cervical cancer.)

Elastomers

These are the latest innovations, showing up in our kitchenware, toothbrushes, and, yep, sex toys. Elastomers are soft, patented polymers, and while they have a suspiciously chemically name, they are phthalate-free and some even have closed pores and are remarkably durable.

The biggest problem I see with these products is that they aren’t getting the recognition they deserve. Vibratex has new soft vibrators made of safe elastomers; California Exotics also markets a line with "Phthalate Free" printed across the front of the package.

But still, sex toys materials can be hard to recognize. So, when in doubt, here are the basic rules of thumb again: use a condom and a water-soluble lubricant and wash everything with a soft soap. Hopefully, sex-toy packaging will include more details soon.

Silicone

I will tell you that silicone is hands down the safest soft material on the market today you can put into your body. Granted, I’m not unbiased, but I don’t know any sex educator who is.

Silicone is hygienic because it has no open pores to harbor bacteria. It is stable in temperatures up to 600 degrees Fahrenheit. You can boil or autoclave it. You can also bleach it in a 10 percent bleach solution or use alcohol swabs. Yes, you can even put it in your dishwasher. Silicone is also hypoallergenic. And it’s chemically inert so it doesn’t react to any other materials and won’t disintegrate when stored with something else.

All silicones are not the same; the two different grades are tin and platinum. While all of the above is true for either silicone, only platinum silicone is medical-grade quality. And the FDA hasn’t approved any silicone used in toys (that I know of). Getting such approval is time-consuming and expensive, and paying the medical liability insurance would triple the cost of your toys.

So there’s the rub, so to speak. But being a responsible consumer doesn’t mean running scared.

The pursuit of pleasure . . . what could be more wonderful! The sex toy industry is full of amazing people creating amazing products. Your satisfaction is very important to all of us: a case of product never leaves my company, Tantus Silicone, without us thinking about all those orgasms going out the door. But the reality is, as a consumer you must take responsibility for what you put into your body.

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